Star Wars Episode VIII – The Last Jedi is coming out soon. Who isn’t excited? But in researching what great stuff to bring to the readers of this blog in terms of Star Wars, I discovered something. Marvel Comics’ first series based on Star Wars started in 1977 and it was… odd. There is one issue, Star Wars #49 that was titled “The Last Jedi.”
Could this give us a taste of what is to come in the upcoming movie? Absolutely not. But let us take a look at the original vision for a story with this title.
The Last Jedi Begins
We begin off with some classic C3PO and R2D2 banter…
Oh, that C3PO, you rascal!
It is revealed that Luke Skywalker and Princess Leia Organa are on the ship. They argue whether the distress signal is legit or not. Then they are like “What could possibly happen?!” and land on the planet anyway.
Immediately… Luke is attacked from behind…
Its apparently a… Groorrg?
Seriously, what the hell is this thing? Any Star Wars Historians care to elaborate? Oh well, I will call him The Sassy Yet Classy Sasquatch…. What will Luke Do with Mr. Sassy? Well… he tries to, and I am not joking, chop off his hand.
I think that literally makes this canon because it is not Star Wars until you lose a limb.
However, it is revealed that the Sassy Yet Classy Sasquatch is immune to Lightsabers. WOW!
Then, out of nowhere.. Luke and Leia are rescued by a guy who appears to be either Jesus or Barry Gibb from the Bee Gees.
This was published in 1981 so it very well might be a guy who is just trying to be Staying Alive…
He ain’t putting up with no one’s shit. His name is Prince Denid. Denid wants to say “DENIED” to his brother who is trying to take his throne on another planet. Not only that but he has protection from…
Damn? THAT is The Last Jedi? Well… that was a bit underwhelming…
It is revealed that he isn’t really a Jedi in that he was never trained. He has it where it counts…in the midiclorians…err…. I mean his heart.
They all go back to the ship and they are talking…
See…the comics didn’t catch Luke Skywalker doing this to the Princess when she wasn’t looking…
We cut to the planet Velmor where they are having a Coronation of Denid’s brother…
And then as he says “if these two shall not be wed, speak now or forever hold your peace” in comes…
For some reason, Luke Skywalker is in casual pirate cosplay. Also, hey! It is Prince Denid… and apparently he is down to his Magnum PI mustache! He also announces is marrying Leia, who is dressed as someone else because they don’t want to be caught. Sure, marrying the Prince will keep Leia totally under the radar.
Betrayal on Velmor
Later, Luke is pulled aside by the head guard who is… PLOTTING TO KILL PRINCE DENID! DUN DUN DUN!
Denid apologizes for announcing his engagement to Leia before proposing to Leia. How silly of him?
The Last Jedi Battles
As time progresses, the guard is trying to kill Denid and Leia, but here comes Casual Pirate Luke Skywalker with his red lightsaber and he is ready to chop some limbs baby!
Before Skywalker gets himself killed, here comes The Last Jedi to rescue him.
The Last Jedi is all like “Its Clobberin Time!” and then… HE DIES????
Leia and Luke leave the planet with Denid and Luke holds a space funeral for this not quite a Jedi Knight.
It was an entertaining piece of fan fiction but I have a feeling that Rian Johnson’s Episode VIII might be just slightly better. What do you think? Let us know in the comments!
ll month long on Geek With That up to the premiere of Episode VIII, we are having The Last Jedi Month here. Keep checking back for more content!