Craiglist can be a good way to find what you need locally. You can get a good deal. Get that free Craigslist couch that is not at all full of bed bugs. Find that missed connection. Meet a stranger. There is absolutely no risk at all!
So, here is my first round of my personal favorite Craigslist Listings that I have scoured all over for you in the past month. Will warn everyone that the last one is NSFW but it is at the bottom and there is some warning.
First Up: 1000 Lotion Bottle Caps
Hey, I think I figured out this guy is up to these days…
Buffalo Bill from Silence of the Lambs is retired from his days of making skin suits and telling victims to put lotion in the baskets. Now he is selling those lotion bottle caps on Craigslist for 5 cents each. What a steal!
You got 2 nickels, well this “Totally Level Headed Person” has 2 lotion bottle caps for your needs. Just don’t ask questions.
A Specific Amount of Fidget Spinners
Here is someone who is not ready to cope with his or her previously going all in on fidget spinners, then immediately regretting that decision. Hey, 93 with fidget spinners you can keep 11.625 Octopuses properly focused on their homework.
The Hanna Montana CD Board Game
You got the Hannah Montana CD Board Game, based off a TV show that was on the air approximately 10 years ago, using Audio CDs, a technology which is unfortunately obsolete for all intents and purposes.
What do you do? Do you…
A. Donate it to a Charity Thrift Shop such as Goodwill
B. Throw it in the garbage
C. Use the CD as a coaster
D. Sell it on Craigslist for 8 dollars
Hey, can’t blame someone for trying, I guess. I mean, hey, Miley Cyrus herself is a huge star now. So you might get those die hard Hannah Montana collectors to go all in. But really, if you’re a true diehard Hannah Montana For Life type of person, wouldn’t you already have this wonderful item?
Now we begin the NSFW Part. So beware!
You’re Selling a WHAT Now?
First of all, kudos to the person brave enough to meet a total stranger to purchase a second hand 17 inch plastic dong. This certainly doesn’t set off any red flags.
Now let us get to this amazing listing. First I did the research, this is a product you can purchase first hand on Amazon for $31. Now it is just between you and your post man
I have the link to the Amazon store entry. However, before you do click on that link, I must emphasize that the reviews are “descriptive as fuck” and you will have George Takei’s “Oh mmyyy” on repeat in your head basically the whole time. Here is the link, you’ve been warned.
“Dick Rambone 17″ Dildo with suctioned balls.”
-Given as a gag gift for a bachelorette party; recently cleaned and sanitized.
There is a certain phrase that I can’t help but notice…
WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN?!!?!?! Are you selling a fully used dildo for $45 dollars. What the hell, lady?! Maybe that is what she meant by the term “Gag” gift????
“HUGE SIZE: Total Length = 16.7 in., Insertable Length = 13.4 in., Width = 2.35 in., Girth = 7.38 in.”
So basically, that would shame Peter North (or so I hear, I really have no idea who that is…honest).
I do not normally take the lord’s name in vein out of respect for my wife’s Catholic Faith. However, this is one of the few times where I’m going to say “GOD DAMN.”
“FOR ADVANCED USERS: Back-Door enthusiasts and Size Queens love the combination of Length, Girth, and Texture of this dildo. The Textured shaft and the semi-rigid veins are designed to stimulate your insides as this dildo stretches your hole(s)”
Yes, everyone, this is for “Advanced Users”….. Not that there is anything wrong with that. Of course not, my father is an advanced user.’
At the end of the day, you do you. I would, personally, if I were in the market for a 17 inch dildo, would buy it new from a store or online. I would not opt for the Craigslist Dildo, but, hey, to each their own.