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Books That Actually Exist – Sharks & Romance

They say never judge a book by its title or cover. That might be true but don’t tell me these aren’t some of the best (or weirdest) book covers you’ve ever seen. So here are some weird books of masturbation, romance, and sharks.

Motherflipping Sharks

Book on Amazon

Much like the movie “Sharknado,” as soon as I heard the title “Motherfucking Sharks” and saw this cover… my response was one word.

I mean, look at what is in the book description on Amazon:

“Where I come from, the children sing a song:

Oh the motherfucking sharks
Oh they’re gonna come to town
Oh they’re gonna kill the babies
Oh they’re gonna make you drowned in your blood

Oh the motherfucking sharks
Oh they’re gonna mince the flesh
They’re gonna swim up and surround you
Don’t you know you’ll never pass the test it’s over

Oh the motherfucking sharks
Oh they don’t care about the gods
And they don’t care about the families
And they don’t care about the cries or tears they’re killers.
Motherfucking sharks
Motherfucking sharks
Motherfucking sharks
Motherfucking sharks”

Come on! I have no idea what that even means or has to do with anything, but I am intrigued. …and maybe a bit frightened too.

Whose Bottom Is This?

Book on Amazon

At first you just by reading the title you think, “This is a creepo book.” Then you discover it is about animals and then you go “Wow…. ummm… Everything ok at home, Wayne Lynch?”

Anybody Can Be Cool … but Being Awesome Takes Practice

Book on Amazon

Well, now we all know why Bruce Campbell didn’t give his autobiography this title. It was already taken but what I assume is THE guide on how to be awesome. It takes practice, apparently.

How to Poo on a Date

Book on Amazon

Hey at first I thought this was a book about written by a unexpected corner of the internet which even I’m too chicken to either confirm or deny exists. Instead it is literally a pep talk about pooping on a date. No… not ON your date like I had interpreted, I mean in the middle of the date. Like when you’re having an awkward conversation about the weather and your jobs, and then flipping nature calls. It is basically an “Everybody Poops” pep talk for dating. 5 stars…

But…You’re a Horse

Book on Amazon

Hay, I have to say right from the get go. This book is a total nay from me. The cover just gives me a long face. I just don’t think the plot would be stable enough. I’m just going to gallop on out of here.

Although, this book is free with a subscription with Kindle Unlimited. Now you have a reason to sign up for that free trial you’ve been considering!

Also, lets just say it, somebody please call the FBI on David Bussell.

Images You Should Not Masturbate To

Book on Amazon

Hey, that is a poor attitude to have right there. Speak for yourself, my friend. To that I say…

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